As I mentioned in brief, the tickly throat Judah and I had on Saturday turned into... nothing for him. For me? Being massively congested and kitten-weak through Wednesday. Yesterday I was just mostly weak, not totally immobile, and I've entered the terrifying-cough phase, which means that I am almost out of this, if I can keep it from turning into bronchitis. Y'all should buy stock in Mucinex and Symbicort.
Then in the middle of that, Monday night, I had a hideous, possibly life-changing nastiness visited upon me. Big boom. Lots of shrapnel. So I've spent this week trying to process and trying to help others process. The problem being that I can't do both at the same time, and... hell, I'd tell you what happened if I felt like it was a good idea, but things are settling and we're waiting on information. Let's just say that me helping others here is sorta injurious to me helping myself, but I have to do it anyway, and I have to fix everything on a damn deadline, because I am going away for a week on Monday.
This was supposed to be my rest week! Last week I had almost all of the deadline stuff - bringing my glasses in, getting Elayna's prom dress tailored, etc. This week was supposed to be the smaller stuff and a lot of rest. Instead it's been constant emotional awfulness while sick.
Here. My schedule. Let me show you it.
5/21-5/22: Chicago, pre-Wiscon
5/23-5/27: WISCON Y'ALL for which I have to prepare a bunch of stuff like right now argh
5/28: I fly home.
5/29: BARCC Gala steering committee meeting, probably last-minute prom stuff
5/30: Awards Night at Elayna's school, when we find out if she got scholarships from local organizations. *crosses fingers*
5/31: Elayna's prom! An afternoon flurry of hair, makeup, corsage.
6/1: Cambridge Riverfest and a friend's party
6/2: nothing YET and skip ahead to
6/5-6/10: My parents, birthmother, aunt, uncle, sister, and brother-in-law all in town for Elayna's June 7th graduation!
So basically I can't breathe 'til after that. Let alone write. It's been a while since I've had time to write and any emotional energy to spare. I'm exactly as happy about that as you think I am. Oh, and somewhere in there, I'll hopefully find out why I'm still in constant physical pain.
Today I'll pick up my glasses and hope they're right this time. Tomorrow we'll visit a florist and see if we can commission a damn corsage already.
Yeah, if you see me at Wiscon? Tea or booze and hugs.
It is not all bad! The undercurrent through the past few months, the reason I've been able to keep it all together... I have a Person who's been holding the other end of my rope. Bastian to my Atreyu; he was there in the swamp, etc. And yes, I have been vague, and yes, I will still be vague - because that, too, it not completely resolved. There are additional dimensions to it that'll be clear really soon, and then I'll feel like I can tell you everything. I've been keeping from discussing because things are not quite complete, and I'd rather present all the OMGFEELS at once! But I did need to say that things are not all bad.
At least the chaos of the past few months has kept me from bursting into tears over Elayna's imminent graduation and departure quite as often as I otherwise might have.
So that is where I am.
Wearing: Right now, tank top and Superman underpants.
Reading: Perfumes: The Guide by Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez, which is both informative and HILARIOUSLY BITCHY.
Writing: Heh. Well, I wrote an outline for a poem that I missed the deadline on because people exploded my life this week.
Knitting: Same; have not touched the needles all week due to constant work on awfulness.
Planning: After breakfast, I'll go pick up my glasses. I have museum passes for the Gardner reserved, and Judah suggested that he go with me (which is frankly the only way I can go - if I get a ride - because my lungs are fragile right now), but I don't know if that still holds, given that his schedule changes every five minutes. (He basically has three jobs now.)
Saturday, I'd like to go to Trivia in the Park.
Sunday, I'd like to go to Strip Hop Hooray, but people in my life seem curiously disinterested in hip-hop burlesque.