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Scheherazade in Blue Jeans
freelance alchemist
Wait a minute... 
4th-Feb-2013 07:27 pm
Brain worms
Got a call from my dad today: they've shipped my late grandparents' liquor cabinet! Oh, the liquor cabinet of song and story. And I knew they were sending me a highball set and Grandma's sewing basket. So I asked how many boxes to expect, just so I could make sure everything came off the truck.

"Three," Dad said.

"Okay," I said.

"Oh, and the suitcases."

That's right, the suitcases. A set of five that all nest into the big one. I have a veritable suitcase farm upstairs, because my parents buy so much stuff whenever we visit that they "lend" us a suitcase to hold it all for the trip back. So I'd protested, but Mom insisted that Elayna needed a matched set of luggage for college, and she got that tone in her voice, and I acquiesced to the suitcases.

So. Three boxes, and the suitcases.

"And the cabinet isn't in a box. They're strapping it to the side of the truck."

"...will it be okay like that?"

"Well, if they put it in a crate, it would be another three hundred pounds."

I... what? Okay. There is no sense in pursuing this.

"So five total."


We wrapped up the phone call. I finished my book.

I suddenly thought, "Huh. A set of highball glasses and a sewing basket... can go in one relatively small box. And there are three boxes. Not including the liquor cabinet. Or the suitcases."

So my question is: what else have they sent?

My parents' logic can be a few sigmas off the norm at the best of times. My mother, in particular, has understandably frayed around the edges a bit following the death of her mother/best friend. Mom's logic chain for the past few months has been, primarily, "I CAN'T THINK ABOUT THAT." Her priority has been to get the condo cleared out so she can replace the carpet and sell it. So... I don't know if they took the logical steps of donating items where they'd usually donate items, et cetera.

So three boxes, of a size that requires LTL freight shipping rather than mailing. Contents of only one accounted for.

I am prepared to be baffled by whatever comes out.
5th-Feb-2013 12:55 am (UTC)
Sounds to me like they are shipping you the actual physical liquor cabinet?
5th-Feb-2013 01:04 am (UTC)
Yes, but it's not in a box... It's strapped on its own inside the truck.
5th-Feb-2013 03:36 am (UTC)
Is there liquor in the liquor cabinet?
5th-Feb-2013 04:55 am (UTC)
This was a thought that occurred to me.
5th-Feb-2013 02:01 pm (UTC)
There is not.
6th-Feb-2013 09:44 pm (UTC)
Shaken, not stirred.
5th-Feb-2013 01:33 am (UTC)
I once received a dress from Paris in a similar mysterious manner...
(Deleted comment)
5th-Feb-2013 02:03 pm (UTC)
I feel like I'm not entirely worthy of it yet! I need to sew more. Judah's actually far better at sewing than I am; we need to having a sewing date. *nod* These tools should be used.
(Deleted comment)
5th-Feb-2013 02:24 am (UTC)
You know, this sounds like the set-up for a cool story. Not one that I have time to write, though. But if your own writerbrain is tempted...

Maybe you'll get a free mummy out of the deal. Or a treasure chest filled with headless dolls. Or a safe without the combination and no way of telling what's inside, so each day you and everyone in the house has a go at guessing it. Or a time-travelling vibrator. So many possibilities.

Forgive me; I'm punch-drunk from an exhausting move.
5th-Feb-2013 02:04 pm (UTC)
Ha! Like *I* have the time?

(Move? Where to?)
5th-Feb-2013 05:33 pm (UTC)
I know. I was mostly being evil.

5th-Feb-2013 05:34 pm (UTC)
(You're supposed to move to Boston, dude. Boston.)
9th-Feb-2013 01:21 am (UTC)
First and last letters are the same. That's something...
5th-Feb-2013 03:15 am (UTC)
My mantra with my mother when she was cleaning out her mother's apartment and then her house in preparation to move: if it got it out of the house, fine. I'd take it. If I wasn't going to use it, I had friends who might and plenty of good places to donate it. Habitat Re-Store is a favorite.
5th-Feb-2013 02:04 pm (UTC)
5th-Feb-2013 04:58 am (UTC) - Possibilities
Pony? Hedgehog? Pygmy goats?

5th-Feb-2013 06:45 am (UTC)
A bowl with puppies in it.
5th-Feb-2013 02:04 pm (UTC) - Re: Possibilities
I *wish*!
5th-Feb-2013 01:59 pm (UTC)
I can tell, the unboxing post is going to be a magical adventure! :D
5th-Feb-2013 06:06 pm (UTC)
I was confused about the cabinet being strapped to the side of the truck--I visualized it strapped to the *outside* of the truck for some reason, and was two-thirds of the way through the post before I realized where it was more likely to be.
5th-Feb-2013 06:47 pm (UTC)
I had this issue also, and was wondering how the hell that became a standardised method of transporting things.
6th-Feb-2013 01:55 am (UTC)
Take video and post it on Youtube.
6th-Feb-2013 03:11 am (UTC)
Heh - yeah, we're *STILL* going through the boxes and furniture that my mother sent (of things that were my grandfather's).
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