So my body rolled a critical fail Friday night that affected me through Saturday and yesterday, and I'm not ready to talk about it just yet, because I have all the swirly rage and humiliation and everything. Just - yeah, that sucked, and the physical effects are not affecting me at this point, but I have to sort out a lot of emotional effects. It sucks to be reminded how fragile my body is and how easily it can utterly fuck me up without warning.
That is that
, and that is why I have been quiet on the interwebs. Do not worry, I'm fine, I'm making modifications so my body won't fail me that way again. (It will fail me in new and different ways!)
So today is the first day I can really get back to work on Cicatrix
. Which is terrifying unto me, just because of the places I have to go inside myself to write it. I have to get it done, though. It's not going to let me go til I'm done. And it's a good old-fashioned katabasis, so I will end in the light of the sun. I'm just stuck in the underworld right now and resisting hard.
I have decided that I get a puppy when I finish this book. I think that is only fair
I actually have been super-efficient this month, so I have absolutely no other tasks in my way. The only thing I have left to do is write a recommendation letter for Elayna for Smith. I have no deadlines, I'm done with the month's copyediting, I have gone through all the slush, I have hung all the art that can currently be hung. I am fighting not to artificially create tasks to put in my own way. Which, yes, I have done before.
It's hard to breathe in the underworld.
Here are some links I have been saving for you; then I will get to work. (I'm off chat and everything.) All about sexual harassment and/or violence, so skip the rest of this post if you need to! But if you can, please do read them. They're all important.
* “He might be on the spectrum.” But what about me?
* The Longest War
* One in Three Kinksters Reports a Boundary Violation
And that is all for now; see you on the other side.