Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong
shadesong

Well. That was some weekend.

Those who follow me on Twitter may have seen (and were very worried by) some of my tweets about this weekend, which can be summed up as: during my party Saturday, a huge boundary violation occurred that caused me to have to leave the party because I could not even look at one of the people involved; I chose not to bring it up with that person because I did not want to detonate their drama bomb in the middle of my party. I tried to stay with the party, but when that person continued to repeatedly violate said boundary three times in five minutes, I had to go upstairs.

I spent a few hours up there, until it got to me so very much that I was being punished, exiled from my own party, shoved essentially out of my own house, for something that I didn't do.

At which point I asked Judah to ask this person to leave.

At which point I found out more info that made things even worse in a different direction, and yesterday I found out *more* things that made everything *so* much worse in two different ways...

Yeah, I was in my pajamas all yesterday. You would be too.

When not in incandescent and well-deserved rage, I have been having very deep emotional conversations for hours at a time. So I am straight-up exhausted. I feel like I probably actually know the extent of everything by now, and root causes, and we're getting to where we can breathe. (It helped when Judah realized how sociopathic the other person's behavior has been since the day we met them.)

I'm not ready to go into exactly what happened and why it was as bad as it was. I know that vague LJ posts make people cranky, but I am taking care of me and my people right now, and if not having details makes you cranky, I leave you to work out your crankiness on your own.

What I am going to do is make a bunch of posts about boundaries (why mine are where they are, why people should respect people's boundaries even if they don't agree with them/have different boundaries), honesty, and respect.

Not everything I'm going to talk about in these posts has to do with this weekend's events (and the things precipitating them). Some of them are the products of months of musing. I haven't been on LJ much, so I have a backlog of pontification! But the unrelated-to-this-weekend things are thematically similar to the what-the-fuck-weekend things, so I'm going to run them all together. Basically, if you read these trying to connect the dots, you'll be really confused and end up with something totally nonEuclidean.

Onward.
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