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Scheherazade in Blue Jeans
freelance alchemist
2nd-Oct-2009 01:52 pm
Katchoo - Terry Moore
Happy birthday to aquila_dominus, haikujaguar, and teddywolf!

Happy early birthday to farwing, rm, and eilonwy, who all advance a year over the weekend!

State of the 'song
So this week has been a steady progression of increasing horror. This week has featured several things where my brain's reaction was just a little snapping noise and a small "I'm done now" voice. My mantra for the past few days has been "I will not let this world break me."

I will not.

I could use a hug, you guys. I could use a hug and a unicorn chaser. So please tell me something wonderful.

I will nap. I have an unexpectedly unplanned evening, so I will watch Glee with the family, and I will maybe watch a movie and work on my shawl. I will read. Tomorrow I get to see a beloved friend. I will keep breathing.

But please. Just tell me something wonderful. I would like that very much. Thank you.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:03 pm (UTC)
I send you an e-hug if you want one and a pile of baby pandas.

2nd-Oct-2009 06:06 pm (UTC)
There is a gorgeous blue sky with effervescent clouds outside my office window. A light breeze is blowing the grasses in the planting outside, and I know that the cool temperatures are making for perfect wafting winds weather. A stunning early fall day, in short.

These kinds of days exist. These perfectly fabulous days of energy and vibrancy. These perfectly awful days of anguish and denial. They exist in balance, the one leading to greater appreciation of the lessons of the other.

Balance comes and goes - the scale pivots, and isn't welded or stuck. It moves and changes with the wind, with the seasons and with the days.

*hugs* and a hope for a better balanced day.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:07 pm (UTC)
And also? The best blender ever:

3rd-Oct-2009 03:54 am (UTC)
Thank you, that made my day a little.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:09 pm (UTC)
Can I show you something wonderful?

2nd-Oct-2009 06:11 pm (UTC)
Where did you get this? Is this a photoshop or does this window exist?
2nd-Oct-2009 06:13 pm (UTC)
Here is a long distance *hug*. I happen to think that bread still hot from the wood oven is a wonderful thing, but your mileage may vary. :-)
2nd-Oct-2009 06:18 pm (UTC)
Ooohhhh...that is a *seriously* wonderful thing...*drooling*
2nd-Oct-2009 06:13 pm (UTC)
The leaves are starting to turn into vibrant shades up here in the Great Frozen North. Can't be long down in the Boston-space.

The geese are flying south, can you see their v's and wonder why it's okay for them to have lousy penmanship?

The air smells like apples and leaves, I wish I could have that as a perfume.

Concord grapes are in season, with their sweet-tart insides and sweet-slippery skins. They are a seasonal indulgence, I would eat them until I got sick if I let myself.

Yes, this week has been sucky, but tomorrow is another day to try again.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:18 pm (UTC)
Apples and leaves: ever smelled BPAL's Samhain?
2nd-Oct-2009 06:17 pm (UTC)
Hugs you fiercely.

I caught my daughter reading some of WTD to her friends from school on her cellphone, all secretive. Turns out they've worked their way through Gryphon & Mermaid portion of Fortune, all well after bedtime, by flashlight light.

You apparently have at least 3 die-hard fans in the North Country besides myself *grin* I think that's pretty wonderful.

20th-Oct-2009 05:44 pm (UTC)
That made me bounce on a very rough day... thank you. :)
2nd-Oct-2009 06:17 pm (UTC)
Something wonderful:

Something *worked*. Three years ago I couldn't reasonably work a half-schedule out at Fest. Half way through each day I literally faded - even on cool days. People would come up to me and ask me if I was ok, ready to cart me off to First Aid if need be. I hadn't worked a full schedule in years as each year had gotten progressively worse.

Similarly, I was unable to commit to the symphony because I simply couldn't regularly get enough energy to go out in the evening after a full day of work. I hurt and I was exhausted.

But we figured out what was wrong, we figured out a treatment plan, I have an amazing physical therapist, wonderful family and friends to support me (both online and offline)...and my attitude changed significantly.

This year I am not a mouse. I am out there full time at fest, in front of people being outgoing and seriously extroverted (eep!), and doing it all weekend long, all day long, not retreating backstage. The wonderful part is we found what *works*!! I've been able to have my love of music *seriously* rekindled in ways way beyond what I thought possible. It's amazing and beautiful, and I have so much catch up work to do ;).


So...*lots of hugs to you to be followed up in person on Thursday*
2nd-Oct-2009 06:18 pm (UTC)
I'll try to hug you in person some time before the end of 2009.

Until then, some wonderful things...

1] I have a simmering hope, due to several good conversations in the last 24 hours. You have an inkling as to how often my hopes get dashed, but this one is still nice to sniff at while it simmers.

2] I am getting some wonderful and gratifying responses to my science fiction destination travel post, more gratifying because I've had several recent waves of feeling personally and professionally invisible.

3] My boy and I are going for several drives in the country over the next few weeks and will get some leaf-peeping in. Of course it's on the way to offical business, but why the hell can't we enjoy the trip?
2nd-Oct-2009 06:18 pm (UTC)
the past few days I have really enjoyed reading this: http://minor-architect.livejournal.com/ the ongoing (exercise motivated) tales of a rescue worker. Set in space faring future-time.

I don't know if this is something you already read, but it's helped calm my mind a bit at the ends of my days. Recommended to me by haikujaguar, who is having a very nice birthday party over in her journal.

If I could be there in person I'd give you real hugs. Ether-conveyed hugs just aren't the same.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:18 pm (UTC)
It's a very very small sort of wonderful, but today I got a hat from a claw machine on the first try. Fifty cents, and now I have a green baseball cap that says Trick or Treat and has embroidered candy corn on it. Also, I will be ironing a leaf into waxed paper for my almost-five-year-old. My Spanish is slooooowly improving. My finch sounds like a little duck when she chirps. I get to work with a good friend tonight, and we will say silly things in Spanish as we work, and startle people who don't expect retail workers to be either helpful or cheerful.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:20 pm (UTC)
Hey! Fancy running into you here!!

Your hat sounds adorable :-)
2nd-Oct-2009 06:19 pm (UTC)
I know you don't really know me...we have several mutual friends. I really enjoy your LJ :-) I realize you have no investment in me.

That being said, here is my piece of wonderful to offer. I've been struggling with depression for a few years, doing the medication dance, and everlastingly grateful for my wonderful husband. This summer I was re-diagnosed, and I have now just concluded over a month on new medication.

It's working. I feel alive again. And that is my piece of wonderfulness to share with you, as you will :-)
2nd-Oct-2009 06:20 pm (UTC)
That is indeed wonderful.
2nd-Oct-2009 06:21 pm (UTC)

Also, here's a happy penguin for you.

2nd-Oct-2009 06:24 pm (UTC)
Love and love. And hugs and wiggly puppies.

Would you like puppy pictures? I could go take some.
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