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Scheherazade in Blue Jeans
freelance alchemist
Albino Penguins of Leng 
26th-Jul-2009 04:00 am
Hearth



Choconomicon: the Lovecraft Truffle Collection, by coffeeinhell of Polidori Chocolates. Flavors so inhumanly delicious, they could only have come from beyond the ken of mortal man. Each box contains eight one-ounce truffles, made with exceptional dedication to quality from the finest ingredients available. Boxes come wrapped in paper stamped with our logo, and tied with twine -- an excellent gift, or a fine indulgence for yourself! Choconomicon contains two each of the following:

* Truffle Over Innsmouth – Behold the green tang of Key Lime as it clings to your tongue, followed by the briny essence of Sea Salt from the ancient, brackish depths!
* Nyarlathotep – Horribly delicious, beyond anything you can imagine. A mesmerizing combination of Dark Chocolate ganache, curry from the mysterious East, and gobbets of chili-laced mango.
* Elder Joy – This fabled treat coveted by the dark deities is a sinister cousin to a popular human confection -- an ambrosial amalgam of Coconut, white-chocolate Ganache, and Rum, enrobed in the darkest Chocolate and topped with a crisp, whole Almond.
* Giant Albino Penguins of Leng – Indeed, you shall be clutched by a primitive dread almost sharper than the worst of your reasoned fears, all the while delighting in the chill of Mint as it infuses the creamiest White Chocolate.

Click here to bid!

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I visited her home for only a weekend. Common manners would have compelled me to stay longer, but her home was... most disconcerting. It was quite lovely from the outside - but within, the air was somehow always moist, and strange sounds were always just barely out of range. It made one quite nervous just walking down the hall.

And then there was the matter of her servants.

They thronged the house, dozens of them; she employed them as butlers, valets, chefs. They rose above me, tall and pale and forbidding, regarding me unblinking me with their terrible red-and-black eyes!

I swear that she was much amused to find me so discomfited, deriving some unseemly pleasure from my discomfort.

It was unseemly, to say the least; cruel, to say the most. She watched me intently, mocking me without speaking, as I struggled to contain my revulsion. My aversion to the beasts was well known, after all.

I left after two days, my business not concluded, my mind in disarray. I have not returned.

Penguins. Why did it have to be penguins?

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Still holding at $1,362.24. Help me get to $1,500 tonight! SPONSOR ME!

Iiiii don't know. It's 4am, and I somehow left a thing I had to write fresh material for 'til now.

For the record? I <3 penguins.

Team Venture is determined.

And this is when The Tired really starts to set in.

Oh, and Kat is the first to reach the "can I set stuff on fire please?" phase.
Comments 
26th-Jul-2009 08:18 am (UTC)
Why did it have to be penguins? Because it is ALWAYS PENGUINS!!! (love this snippet ^_^)

Go go Team Venture, caffeine for the win!

Gah, why do I live on a different continent?! Those chocolates look and sound soooooo amazingly good.... oh well, I will imagine eating them in my head, alongside the bacon icecream.
26th-Jul-2009 09:26 am (UTC)
Hi! Chocolate. Hand-crafted. Lovingly hand-crafted, even. (I can vouch for this chocolate. I've eaten samples of it.)

(In that first paragraph, I am not saying "Hi" to the chocolate.")
26th-Jul-2009 09:30 am (UTC)
Oh, and Kat is the first to reach the "can I set stuff on fire please?" phase.

If Kat were allowed to burn one thing and one thing only (and burn it in a controlled way too that won't harm anything else), what would she get to burn?
26th-Jul-2009 12:02 pm (UTC)
They look sooo yummy. If only I lived in the US right now!

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