Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong

  • Music:
I first wrote the story of my rape as part of a thinly-fictionalized (read: I only changed the names) NaNoWriMo project in 2002. I'd always planned to write the rape into the story, but was prompted to do so by another unfortunate occurance - two days into that NaNoWriMo, my house was broken into and burglarized. So, figuring that I was already feeling triggered by this violation of my space, I sat down and wrote about the rape right then and there. I didn't post it til later that month... I was prompted to post it because I was going through serious stalker issues, and wanted to show you, gentle readers, what it feels like to be violated and fear continued violation.

The post has gotten comments from all over. I've written sequels of a sort, talking about returning to the scene, about the rape kit exam in the hospital, et cetera. And I am satisfied with the quality of writing in those, because in both cases, I sat down to write it out, to *communicate*. Whereas the original post was originally trembling-freaked me telling a story to myself, a story I already know, and only showing it to anyone because of subsequent harassment.

Why am I fussing about this?

* Telling my story verbally on Saturday, making specific points I had to communicate, showed me that I am not communicating as well in that post as I could. I just spewed stuff. There are points I could be making.

* I've gotten another request to use my story in an education-type module. My answer to that question will always be "Hell yes" - if I can help give the education more impact, hell yes. But... it's not the best writing I can do.

So I'm pondering rewriting my story. Or at least editing the hell out of it. Adding more detail.

I don't know. Would that dilute the post, or make it more effective?

Anyway. Just something on my mind.
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