In my next life, I want parents who actually fucking parent.
Yes, it is a verb, too, dammit.
All of the bad shit that happened in my childhood and adolescence was because they declined to parent me. They handed me off to friends, to "programs".
A child is a commitment.
Let me repeat that.
A child. Is. A commitment.
When I was pregnant with Elayna, I agonized - can I care for this child, this person? It's not about having a cute little baby. It's about having a child. Kids still have needs when they come out of diapers, and the needs get more complex, and if you can't handle caring for not just a baby, but a toddler, a child, a young adult - if you are going to fucking abandon them, physically or psychologically, when things get tough - don't have a child.
No one deserves that.
I think I am only now learning that I did not deserve that.
Yes, it is a verb, too, dammit.
All of the bad shit that happened in my childhood and adolescence was because they declined to parent me. They handed me off to friends, to "programs".
A child is a commitment.
Let me repeat that.
A child. Is. A commitment.
When I was pregnant with Elayna, I agonized - can I care for this child, this person? It's not about having a cute little baby. It's about having a child. Kids still have needs when they come out of diapers, and the needs get more complex, and if you can't handle caring for not just a baby, but a toddler, a child, a young adult - if you are going to fucking abandon them, physically or psychologically, when things get tough - don't have a child.
No one deserves that.
I think I am only now learning that I did not deserve that.