Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong
shadesong

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Today, I am actually answering the usually-ignored "Unknown Caller" calls just so I can tell the telemarketers to fuck off.

Not in so many words. But I should. Because they keep droning on in their scripts.

Telemarketer, for the third time: "...and we could really use your support..."
Me, for the third time: "We do not make donations over the phone." (We don't. It encourages the little fuckers. We donate to plenty of charities who actually send us paperwork. Just not on the phone. Telemarketing is intrusive and assholic.)
Telemarketer: "...okay, if you could just let me know how much I can put you down for..."
Me: "Hey. HEY!" (that last in MomVoice) "Excuse me. Sir."
Telemarker: "...yes?"
Me: "You are not going to get any money out of me over the phone. No money. At all. If you want to send me your literature, I will gladly look it over. But you WILL NOT get ANY money out of me over the phone. So just. Stop. Talking."
Telemarketer: "...um."
Me: "Do you understand?"
Telemarketer: "We'llsendyouourinfoit'llgettherein3to5daysokaythankyou?"
Me: "Thank you. Goodbye."

Another one was easier.

Telemarketer: "Is this Mrs [Gojirawitz]?"
Me: "No." *hangs up*
Me, muttering to self: "It's Ms. [Gojirawitz] to you."
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