Dad: "Do you want this?"
Me: "Well, I don't need it."
Dad: "But do you want it?"
Me: "I already have one. I don't need another one. But thanks."
Dad: "Well, you should get another one."
Me: *sigh* "Well, you can get it for Elayna."
Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
(I now have several pricey new pairs of jeans. Adam, you have three new shirts. Elayna... Elayna has stuff. Much stuff.)
Another highlight: me saying "Mom, size 4 is not fat." Yes. I know I'm a healthy weight, because my mom is eyeing me like I'm Rosanne Barr at a buffet. And yes, I have weight-weirdness in my head right now. But size 4 is absolutely, categorically not fat.
So. We're currently waiting for Elayna to come home. Then we're going to get her eyes checked (not at LensCrafters, Ardie!), and then we'll go get her a cellphone. Because my mother thinks it's a crime to leave the child cellphone-free for the ten minutes it takes her to walk home from school. "What if there's an emergency?" "She'll run down the street screaming 'FIRE!'"
Damn, I wish I was going to Diesel tonight.