Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong

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Oh FUCK no.

The Florida thing?


Just called my parents, vacationing on Marco Island. Talked to Elayna (who, when presented with options 1 and 2 from the earlier post, said that she prefers staying in Atlanta to begin school, and who has gathered many seashells for me). Talked to mom.

Thank the gods we did the small-talk before launching into the Florida idea.

Her: "How are you?"

Me: "Not so great."

Her: "What is it?"

Me: "The pain thing."

Her: "Have you seen your neurologist?"

*grits teeth*

Understand, this is a question she asks during every conversation. Understand, the neurology office can't get me in til November.

Me: "No."

Her: "Well, you need to do something about that."

Me: "I am trying."

Her: "You need to talk to your primary care doctor. Make her call them."

Now, I was going to tell her that I was going to ask my primary care doctor to do just that. But she followed up with: "Or just go to your neurologist's office and tell them you need to be seen."

Me: "I can't do that, Mom."

Her: "Yes, you can."

Me: "I cannot go without an appointment; they won't see me."

Her: "Well, you need to do something."

Me: "I. Am."

Her: "What are you doing?"

Me: "Calling them almost every day. Leaving voicemails that are not responded to."

Her: "You need to just go in there and sit there til they see you."

Me: "Mother. I am in debilitating pain. It is worse when I remain still. I'm not going to go sit in a chair for eight hours."

Her: "But you could go vacation in Boston?"

Me: "I was not in pain in Boston. Not like this."

Her: "Well, you need to be active about your treatment."

Me: "I. Am. Active."

Her: "Well, you need to be proactive."


Me: "Okay. I am going to go now. I am glad that Elayna is having a good time. Goodbye." *click*


My. Entire. Fucking. LIFE. Revolves around my fucking treatment. Fighting through side effects. Doing research. Calling doctors. Appointment after appointment, bloodwork after bloodwork. I am writing a fucking book about this.

How dare she -

I can hardly breathe right now, I'm so pissed off. So no. FUCK no. Forgive me my moment of utter stupidity. We are going to Boston, not just because it's the best thing, but because I need to be as far away from this bitch as possible. And homicide involves so much paperwork.

And now that I'm not working a day job? I don't have to send Elayna to summer camp. So as far as next summer goes, we shall see what we shall see.

EDIT: I am much happier now that I have had an Oreo milkshake. I add this so the people who tend to worry don't get to worrying. And now I am going to go watch a DVD. *nod*
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