Me: "What did you do wrong?"
Elayna: *repeats what I told her, word for word*
Me: "No. In your own words, tell me what you did wrong, and why it was wrong."
This took some time to ingrain in her brainmeats. But, y'know, she was in kindergarten. There were discussions of consequences of her actions - not my punishments, but the consequences that naturally follow from the actions that one takes.
And she got to the point where she understood.
By the time she was about six and a half, seven.
Do she still fuck up? Yeah, occasionally. Everybody occasionally fucks up.
But the thing is... do you understand what you did wrong? Do you understand why it was wrong?
Dealing with grown adults who have a clear complete lack of understanding in that regard is... appalling. The genuine lack of grokking that there's been wrongdoing, that the action taken has impacted another person or persons. Floors me.