Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong
shadesong

Thankful.

Of all the silly things to be thankful for... but people with similar physical issues will agree, I think.

It isn't public knowledge, in my department, why I've gone part-time. But sometimes people delicately ask.

And it's amazing how, a big chunk of the time, they grok.

They know. Sometimes they directly know someone with epilepsy. This sysadmin's brother-in-law. This professor's former grad student.

One professor astutely asked, "Is it the epilepsy that's keeping you part-time, or is it the medication?"

One friend-of-an-LJ-friend, when she found out, instantly nodded, comprehension clearly dawning - "Those medications take a lot out of you."

I'm understood.

It means a lot to know that I'm not alone. Even if I don't know anyone in meatspace with my disorder, anyone else who's fighting this fight - I'm not alone. Prof. W.'s student spent years fighting the brainfog to write a thesis. The sysadmin's brother-in-law is managing, after several medication trials, to hold down a job.

But it's hard.

I'm not the only one it's hard for. Not alone. And there are people who know.
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