Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong

Poly terminology

I have a problem with the word "sweetie".

Not a "problem", per se. Just - it's maddeningly nonspecific. And, being a writer, I have a Need to firmly categorize everything.

I was recently told that I "already have a couple-three sweeties", and eek, that's been working at me! *laugh* Because, although they are all sweet, and I have called all of them "sweetie" and "honey" at various points, that's not how they're categorized in my head. Just. Too. Vague.

yendi is my partner. My husband. Part of me.

volta is something else entirely, but "sweetie" doesn't fit.

Doesn't fit with kires, either - less than with the other two, because kires and I don't have a romantic Relationship. (I was surprised when the person said three; then I realized oh! Kires! It took me a second.) I believe the appropriate acronym for Kires is ToCoToX - Too Complicated To EXplain. Is love. But very different. Good-friend-love. But more than friends-with-benefits, and less than a romantic couple. TOCOTOX!

I have Something with each of them, and that something is vital. But "sweetie" doesn't fit.

I've gotten to the point where I'm okay with just, say, Kires being Kires and not needing anything more specific to label him in my head.

I have someone "new" in my world - I say "new" because it's no great surprise to me. :) And I'm in the beginning stages of trying to categorize. *laugh* But I'm pretty laid back about that, this time.
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