Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong (shadesong) wrote,
Magical Truthsaying Bastard Shadesong

Angst re: Fred

I had actually totally talked myself out of worrying-if-it's-cancer this morning. I was mostly just nervous because I didn't know what it would be like, feel like, the needle thing.

It was one of those, "See, 'song, you're all in a tizzy over nothing. It's a cyst, they'll drain it, you'll be fine and you'll feel silly for worrying."

But then she said the thing about it being awfully dense and about it being "toothpasty", and there was just the teeniest change in tone.

Before today, I was doing the "it's probably nothing but it could very well be something", then I went to "it's almost certainly nothing", and now I'm pretty solidly on "it is fucking cancer" and trying to talk myself out of that.

Last post about it today, I promise. I'll just add on to this one if I feel the need.
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