Cute t-shirts. Panties. The jeans that fit me the bestest. What passes for "eveningwear" - the slinky polka-dot dress volta bought me, the slinky mesh separates I got at Anthropologie, the non-slinky sundress with the strawberries on it. Sunscreen. Sandals. Books - as if I'll have time to read. Notebooks - because I will make time to write. Bathing suits. I'm bringing a larger suitcase than normal as I'd be cutting it close with a carryon, and I know laundry takes up extra room, and I am likely to have a few souvenirs.
I. Am. Fucking. Terrified.
Going "home" for the first time in ten years. Probably for the last time.
What if everything's different? I don't mean the tourist shit.
What if everything's the same?
What if I don't know my way around anymore? That's haunting me.
What if what if?
What if I see people I know? What if I don't? What if people remember me? What if they don't?