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Scheherazade in Blue Jeans
freelance alchemist
Anonymous Sex Confessional 
22nd-Jul-2010 07:32 am
Typewriter - tell me about it
slipjig ran one of these this week; it's been a long time since I did it, so here we go.

I will copy his rules:

Anonymous comments are enabled for the next 48 hours, and IPs are not being logged. Share something about you sexually: wants, experiences, preferences, fears. Anything goes, and yes, this applies even if you don't have a sex life right now. Confession is good for the soul.

The three disclaimers:

1) You may safely assume that the comments to this post contain text of an NC-17 nature. Treat accordingly.

2) The management reserves the right to cease operation of the confessional at any time. Drama and abusive language will not be tolerated.

3) Feel free to link to this post from your own journal. The more, the merrier.


Pay close attention to #2. Don't make me turn this blog around.

Ready set go.

EDIT: Also, I want to make it clear to anyone coming in from elsewhere that this is a kink-friendly and judgment-free space. The nature of this sort of confessional is that sometimes people will be confessing things that are difficult for them to talk about. As long as it's all consensual, it's all okay here.
Comments 
22nd-Jul-2010 12:12 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I have had bad luck with friends with benefits in the past... except when they're long-distance. It seems like the distance helps defuse the drama that comes with the territory. It also means I don't get laid as much, but oh well. :-)
22nd-Jul-2010 12:44 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I fear that sex with the person I intend to stay with forever will not become as good as it was with my previous lover. We're still fairly new, and I plan on helping us make it better, but this fear is the underlying cause.
22nd-Jul-2010 01:03 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I am horny beyond recognition, and yet it hurts too much (physically, not emotionally) to be touched. I can't even masturbate. I don't know what to do.
22nd-Jul-2010 01:16 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I'm male. I have a female friend... we're very good friends... who I really want to have sex with.

I don't want to wreck the friendship. I just really want to bend them over and the both of us have some fun!

I'm too afraid to ruin what I already have with them to risk asking them, though.
27th-Jul-2010 03:06 am (UTC)
Anonymous
I'm female. I have a male friend. We're very good friends. Been very good friends for a long time. I really want to have sex with him. I have no idea whether he has sexual interest in me, but I know he loves me very very deeply. He does not form attachments easily.

I've told him how I felt about him.

He didn't respond to that. I know it made him uncomfortable. Then when I told him the last bit, he wanted to see me again after blowing me off a couple of times. So that's coming up.

I'm married. In a monogamous relationship. I'd blow that in a heartbeat because I already feel like I'm cheating on the love of my life. Don't get me wrong. I adore my husband and wouldn't leave him.

But I met my friend first. If we hadn't lost track of each other at one point (my fault), I'd have married him instead.

Truth is, if my husband died, I'd ask my friend to marry me moments later.

Until then, I don't want him to get remote again. I want him. I think about him all the time. He won't tell me what he's feeling.

There's no good solution for this.
22nd-Jul-2010 01:23 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
My partner's depression is seriously hurting our sex life. Either he's too depressed to be interested, or his antidepressant makes it almost impossible for him to ejaculate. The poly credo of "just get another partner" won't work for me. I don't just want a stunt cock; I want him.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:24 pm (UTC) - tangential
Anonymous
That's so not the poly credo. To me, monogamy is "you've already got one, why would you want any others?" while polyamory is "people are not interchangeable, they cannot be substituted for one another." I think that's the poly credo.
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22nd-Jul-2010 01:41 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
My hormones have been through the roof this month for reasons unknown. It's probably for the best that I'm isolated at the moment, because if I had available local partners, I don't think I'd ever stop fucking.
22nd-Jul-2010 11:50 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I've also been reeeeaaally horny lately. I thought this of myself for a while, but extended sex (not quickies) 3 times a day completely satiates me for about 24 hours. not that i and my partners have that much free time
22nd-Jul-2010 01:45 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I don't like mouth kissing. I like licks and nips and kisses and bites pretty much everywhere else, but I don't like mouth kissing. I think the best "makeout" sessions I ever had were when I was sick so there was no kissing allowed.

It's not that I'm grossed out by it; I just don't find it fun.
22nd-Jul-2010 04:34 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I've only just managed to get to "not grossed out by it", and even then, not all the time.

So, with you there.
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22nd-Jul-2010 01:52 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
It seems that a large part of poly-focus is on sexual interaction, while mine is on relationship-building. I want to *know* someone before I date them, before I sex them up. Is that so wrong?
22nd-Jul-2010 01:53 pm (UTC)
I'm with you on that.

Edit: Which is not to say we need to be in a massive committed relationship, just that people shouldn't open with "Nice boots, wanna fuck?"

Edited at 2010-07-22 06:28 pm (UTC)
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22nd-Jul-2010 01:59 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I bitch about pushy bottoms all the time, but the truth is, I'm the pushiest and bitchest of them all. I need someone with a fucking spine who isn't afraid to play a little rough, someone to shut my smart mouth and fill my pussy and fuck the attitude right out of me. Someone who can make me wet with a well-phrased order, someone who can make me squirm with just a breath on my neck.

So far, everyone I've tried has come up painfully short.

My submission is a gift and I'm aching to give it to someone, but it has to be someone who wants to WORK for it. I'm worth it, I swear.

I'm not a wild horse to be broken, I'm a wild fire burning out of control. You need to learn how to control me. And then, oh, and then...

Jesus fuck, I am so goddamn horny.
22nd-Jul-2010 08:46 pm (UTC)
I would love to top someone like you.
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22nd-Jul-2010 02:02 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I have had exactly two sexual partners in my life, the second of whom I married.

The problem is...I'm basically kinky, my partner is very much not so. Not that they are turned off by it, it's just that my partner can't see the point, or goes off in fits of giggles at the idea... [yes, *ouch!*]

This leaves me feeling pretty unsatisfied. I love my partner, but plain vanilla sex is like only ever eating mac&cheese, after a bit I go right off the idea. Problem is.. I still want sex.

Giving serious consideration to finding someone with whom I can play, but not being part of the kinkster scene, I have no idea how, or what it'd do to our relationship...
22nd-Jul-2010 02:28 pm (UTC)
go to fetlife.com
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22nd-Jul-2010 02:18 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
The other night I ran into a guy who's somewhere between a friend-of-a-friend and a friend. This is the guy with whom I have had the most intense sex of my life. The thing is, he likes it rough. And when I'm with him, it's fantastic. And then afterwards when I'm bruised and bleeding and can't have sex or wear a tank top for a week or so I think "Maybe this guy is too rough for me."

And I really thought about asking if he wanted to hook up again. And I decided I didn't want to deal with the aftermath. But I'm still considering it.
22nd-Jul-2010 02:25 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I didn't have sex for the first time until after I had been married for a year. It was not due to a lack of desire. I had tried to have sex many times even with people before I met my husband but it hurt like hell. Like want to throw up it hurts so bad. All the gynos I went to told me I needed to "relax." Thanks to a gyno who actually listened and did her job, it was discovered my hymen was till in tact at 28 and very thick...like I needed surgery to have it removed thick. Now I can have all the sex I want. And I LOVE sex. And my husband is a great sex partner. But sometimes I wonder about sex with other people since I never had the chance to have sex with anyone but him. I am especially wish I could have the chance to have sex with an ex of mine because we always wanted to have sex together but couldn't. I am not even in touch with the ex anymore but its just a sense of "I never got to do this" curiosity.
22nd-Jul-2010 10:33 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
Ask the husband if he's okay with you experimenting elsewhere?
22nd-Jul-2010 02:25 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I've given up on sex. I cannot find a partner who cares for anything other than their own pleasure, who brings anything to the table other than their simple presence.

I haven't felt sexy in my entire life.
23rd-Jul-2010 03:27 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
Wow. We should trade partners, or something.

I can't find anyone who isn't obsessed with getting me off or doing what I want, as long as what I want involves getting me off. Which is usually *not* what I want.
22nd-Jul-2010 02:35 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I don't think I have ever felt sexy in my life. I've had several sexual partners and almost all of them were relationships of some kind. Almost every single one has ended in disaster. I've given up trying to find anyone who understands me, my dominance, my body, or that even as a dominant, I need to be held and cuddled too sometimes. I despair that I am too dominant, moody, smart, fat, and sexual for anyone to really desire not just sexually but relationship wise too.
22nd-Jul-2010 09:15 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I suspect we'd get along really well.
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22nd-Jul-2010 03:07 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I wish that we had more kink in the bedroom. I still consider us as being in a D/S relationship even though it's been so long that there has been anything overtly of that nature in a very very long time.
And I worry that right now all of our sex is focused on baby-making. It's still good, and we're having a lot more of it, but it's still baby-making sex.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:11 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I'm exploring my kinkier side, but I'm nervous about the potential outcomes. Will I discover something about myself that I can't handle? Will I open myself up for another sexual assault, or an abusive relationship? If my employer finds out, will I lose my job? (People have been driven out for less.) Or will I love it so much that it will consume me?
22nd-Jul-2010 03:13 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I love my lover fiercely. She is whipsmart and inventive and creative and so beautiful it makes my heart ache. But her sex drive is perhaps one-twentieth of mine--it's not that she doesn't enjoy it, it's more that when she's not really in the mood then she's just amusedly tolerant. And I won't push just because I'm horny; enthusiastic consent requires the enthusiasm as much as the consent, that's the point.

I've only rarely had lovers--of either gender--whose sex drive even vaguely approaches mine. I know I'm not a freak for enjoying sex, but geez, sometimes it feels like it.

Thank heavens for porn, and for her being amusedly tolerant of that too. ;)
23rd-Jul-2010 04:10 am (UTC)
Anonymous
My very monogamous partner could have written this - it made me do a double-take!

From the other end: I feel terrible when I can't match his enthusiasm or need, because he's not wired to seek other partners. I'm deeply grateful that he still loves me, that porn is widely available, and he's willing to take care of his needs when necessary!
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22nd-Jul-2010 03:21 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
Sometimes I lament the fact that being in a monogamous and stable and likely forever relationship means I won't ever get to have a hot fling with a tattooed bad boy.

Especially when there actually IS a tattooed bad boy in my life, and not only does he have basically the best body I've ever seen, I am fairly sure that a) he's kinky, and b) he'd be up for it. If I were single, I would have already moved on this SO hard.

I love my partner very much, though, and I recognize that the future we've got in store is not worth throwing away for a few hours of banging my lust object.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:23 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I really (and I mean really) want my partner to fuck me while roleplaying our respective larp characters (lame, I know...)

Problem is, what I'm looking for is a gloriously dirty kinkfest, and he's rather on the Vanilla side.

Hopefully, he'll at least not balk when I try the costume
26th-Jul-2010 04:05 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
In-character sex is AWESOME. You can find yourself doing - and enjoying - stuff that would never occur to you, but that your character finds Very Good.

I, uh, have to admit that out-of-character sex is more unusual for me these days.

And some of it's GLORIOUSLY kinky.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:23 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
Don't get me wrong, orgasms are great. But I can give myself one of those. Yes, it's better with someone, definitely. That's not the most fun part for me, though, oddly enough. (And the sweaty thrusting bumping part isn't terribly fun when you get right down to it. Perhaps I'm an odd guy.)

A lot of the fun is the build-up. Most of my fun is in exploring, and especially the teasing. I love that, the winding up and then easing back a bit, then finding another way to turn up the heat, then easing back... you get the picture. Driving her crazy, just about to the point where she's ready to either beg or to throw me down on the bed and jump on.

The release is just a bonus at that point. Perhaps I'm a strange guy.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:47 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I can have my own orgasms on my own. What I can't have on my own are her orgasms. That's a lot of the fun. ("her" is not a specific person, it's almost anyone I'm having sex with)
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22nd-Jul-2010 03:25 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I identify exclusively as a woman and female, but I often wish I had a penis. Sometimes I can even feel one there. I have considered packing, but I can't afford the equipment.
22nd-Jul-2010 07:25 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
Will any of these help?

Packing tips (http://members.tripod.com/ftms_r_us/tips/packing.html)
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22nd-Jul-2010 03:35 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I am NOT getting laid enough. At all. Several factors prevent me from going out and finding another partner. I am tired of porn and my hand. I want a week in bed, barely coming up for air. I want to be pushed to my limit. I want to be tired of sex.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:35 pm (UTC)
This is neither anonymous nor much of a confession, but right now if someone came over and washed the dishes in the sink and on the stove and the table, I would reward them with anything my body was capable of. *sigh*
22nd-Jul-2010 03:56 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
How bad can it be?
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22nd-Jul-2010 03:45 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
So. I'm underemployed right now. And as such I have most afternoons free. And during those afternoons I get good and horny. I would love a local booty call who I could just call or IM and say, "Get over here" and we fuck until we fall asleep. Post-coital afternoon naps, yay.

I semi-know a couple of kinky types who might be into such an arrangement and might have afternoons free, but I am afraid to ask them. It's pretty stupid.

That being said, I get super-aroused reading casual encounters ads on Craigslist but I would never actually respond to a CL ad. So I remain unfucked. Sigh.
22nd-Jul-2010 03:46 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I get super-aroused reading casual encounters ads on Craigslist but I would never actually respond to a CL ad.

Me too on both counts.
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22nd-Jul-2010 04:03 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I have never understood the conceit that female sluts are treated with pure disdain while male sluts are applauded and congratulated. While the former is certainly true, the latter, at least in the social groups I frequent, is not.

I am a boy and, at heart, a slut. I love lots of sex with lots of people. I am excited by the idea of physical intimacy with most of my best friends, whom I love and think are great. It's fine that usually that wouldn't work out, of course; I understand that and I am still very happy to have the wonderful friends I have.

But ...I am learning that even in the most sex-positive poly circles I travel in, when you're a man, your sluthood is tolerated at best and deeply resented at worst. I feel ashamed of my libido, ashamed of my widespread attractions. I feel ashamed that being without sex for several weeks makes me antsy and keyed up.

I'm tired of feeling like some kind of nymphomaniac.
22nd-Jul-2010 04:48 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I could've written that, if it stupped at "... and deeply resented at worst." I don't feel ashamed, & I can be happy without sex for several weeks or longer, though not as happy as I would be with sex.
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