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Scheherazade in Blue Jeans
freelance alchemist
26th-Jun-2009 07:28 am
Happy early birthday to robyn_ma and bodhifox, who both advance a year over the weekend!

Today I see my neuro and say flat out things like "quality of life issue".

I need a break from the chemicals bombarding my brain. Which means it'll get worse before it gets better. But I am increasingly certain that I am on the wrong levels of the wrong medications, and they are interacting in bad ways.

Breathing Room
Wherein I vague it up: I had a Good Thing happen yesterday that I view as the universe rewarding me for being gracious re: taking a lot of people's shit. So. Thank you, universe.

And part of the effect of this is that I no longer *have* to do WTD next week - so if I do it, it's because I want to. Which makes all the difference.

This article sums up a lot of the problems I have with our repeated consumption of the video of Neda dying. I agree that the documentation of her death helped bring the lens of the world to bear on Iran; I agree that it was important in the grand scheme of things.

But as I was watching it, I was
a) thinking "get that camera out of her face, help her - she's dying, sing to her, don't film her!"
b) acutely and uncomfortably aware that I was watching a snuff film.

Only tangentially related
If you are there when I am dying, sing to me.

Link Soup
* Interesting business model.
* Tell your health care story, and help others.
* Oooohshiny.

Daily Science
Blasting the atmosphere of Saturn's moon Titan with X-rays can produce a base component of DNA, a new laboratory study suggests. While the effect may only occur periodically, when meteoroid impacts deliver water to the moon's surface, the finding adds to evidence that Titan may be ripe for life.

Friday Memage!
Wearing: little blue slip.
Reading: Sit Down and Shut Up, by Brad Warner (upstairs); Wednesday is Indigo Blue: Discovering the Brain of Synesthesia by Richard E. Cytowic and David M. Eagleman (downstairs); Idolon by Mark Budz (purse).
Writing: I need to get to storyboarding "Flying Lessons", and I have a workshop story due Sunday. Hm. Maybe that, serialized, will be a WTD. We'll see.
Planning: Doctor today, then tabling for BARCC - maybe. It's an outdoor tabling, and it looks like thunderstorms, so that may get rescheduled if they don't have anyplace to move it to. If it gets rescheduled, I may take myself to see Moon.
Tomorrow's the only day we have to get Elayna's room clean and all of her camp stuff how she needs it, so that's the big project tomorrow. We'll celebrate by watching "Macbeth", her friends' Backyard Shakespeare Company production this summer, so she knows who she wants to be.
Sunday she has dim sum with her friends; later, we have the Explo orientation session. Yay Explo!

26th-Jun-2009 12:37 pm (UTC)
Wherein I vague it up: I had a Good Thing happen yesterday that I view as the universe rewarding me for being gracious re: taking a lot of people's shit. So. Thank you, universe.

Phew. We need good stuff like that to happen.
26th-Jun-2009 12:53 pm (UTC) - If you are there when I am dying, sing to me.
Dam it, that brought a tear to my eye.

What would you want to hear on your death bed?
26th-Jun-2009 01:04 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the singing bit. That's really great.
26th-Jun-2009 01:37 pm (UTC)
This might be a deeply idiotic comment; if so, you have my apologies in advance. How severe/frequent are your seizures? I remember, vividly, your description of how they feel, but what I'm wondering is whether it would be possible/feasible to go unmedicated for them; thus far it seems like the treatment is worse than the cure, and that makes no sense to me.
26th-Jun-2009 01:52 pm (UTC)
If I'm there, I will sing for you the following:

"My life rolls on in endless song
Above Earth's lamentation.
I hear the real though far off hymn
that hails the new creation.
Above the tune of endless strife,
I hear the music ringing.
It wakes an echo in my soul.
How can I keep from singing?

When though the tempest 'round roars,
I know the truth it liveth.
When though the darkness 'round me close
songs in the night it giveth.
No storm can shake my inmost calm,
while to that rock I'm clinging.
Since love is lord over heaven and earth --
how can I keep from singing?"
26th-Jun-2009 03:35 pm (UTC)
That's one of the ones I want at MY funeral!
26th-Jun-2009 02:47 pm (UTC)
Wearing: PJs.
Reading: A Warhammer 40k novel.
Writing: Planning to write more on the current project I am working on (Of Oysters, Pearls And Magic).
Planning: To rest during the weekend. I am now 8 months pregnant!
26th-Jun-2009 03:35 pm (UTC)
What song would you like us to sing?

Perhaps, on the very little basis of having met you once, I'd choose "Manticore's Lullaby."

I haven't watched the video. I just read a few articles, and a poem about her.
26th-Jun-2009 04:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the part about Neda. I feel exactly the same way. While I have been avoiding the clip wherever possible (have only seen a few seconds of it and couldn't look away), the images of her empty, smiling face are flashed on the TV at least once a day.

I don't think she'd choose to be a martyr. Personally, I think she'd prefer being alive, actually. I understand the significance and the galvanization at a rallying point, but she was a person, and so much more than an ideal to fight for.
26th-Jun-2009 04:02 pm (UTC)
A couple years ago a good friend of mine died of brain cancer. She spent her last few days in Hospice. The day before she died a lady brought her full sized harp and was playing in the hallway for the pleasure of the folks there. My friend chased her away from her door, didn't want to hear that, wasn't dead yet. She had been the editor of two online rock music magazines during her life time, and was a huge promoter of local talent. The evening she died the local group Crushed was in her room rocking it up as she left us. She had been unconscious for the previous 12 hours, but I'm sure she heard them :)
26th-Jun-2009 04:32 pm (UTC)
Wearing: a towel. I should probably get dressed.
Reading: Thrones, Dominations by Jill Paton Walsh (started by Dorothy Sayers), the whole magazine backlog.
Writing: Finishing this edit of my dissertation experiments and then on to the general discussion! This is a big step.
Planning: work on dissertation, tutor, something vaguely elaborate on the grill tonight. Going to a classic car show tomorrow and then late lunch with friends and then perhaps wine shopping. Maybe going out tonight.

I have another book on synethesia by Cytowic somewhere. Interesting stuff.
26th-Jun-2009 05:08 pm (UTC)
Wearing: A flouncy aqua skirt, a plain white button down shirt, and a tank top with Billy and Mandy's Grim and the words "I've come to reap your immortal soul" on it.

Reading: Coraline.

Planning: Today is for cleaning out an overgrown closet. Tomorrow may be for attending a showing of Serenity and Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog at a formerly unknown but obviously awesome "Cinema 'n' Drafthouse." Sunday is a Warhammer tutorial day for The Boy's best friend.
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